The End of the World

 

Sorry for the delay in posting but wanted to share my thoughts on "End of the World Day" anyway.

Mayans were very smart people.  They developed a calendar which went for thousands of years in a repeating cycle...a wheel within a wheel so to speak.  Today, 12-21-12, the winter solstice for 2012, was the end of that cyclical calendar.  Thousands of years of repetition ended TODAY...ok let me repeat that...their calendar which started in something like 3114 BC ENDED TODAY.  Evidently, 5000 years+ of predicting future events is all the Mayans could handle.  That's a long run.  Maybe something to be considered, maybe a small pause in our busy lives might be in order.

If I were to recap this past year, I would say that it was ruled by violence, disagreement, derision and divisiveness.  World peace didn't happen, in fact we find ourselves at this moment in time, staggering from not only international violence but crimes here at home that have made us reel in confusion and anger.  We all feel that things need to change but disagree vehemently how to bring about this needed change.  We cannot even seem to agree on what kind of change needs to occur. 

Snowflakes falling 12/21/12 - blanketing the world in white

Most people laughed and joked about the "end of the world as we know it" occurring today.  But we seem to have made it through the day without earthquakes or killer tornadoes.  Ohio is having a nice snowstorm, however.   Some people refer to the ending of what is astrologically known as the Piscean Age and the beginning of the Aquarian Age.  We all know about the Age of Aquarius from the popular song.  It is supposed to be an age of peace. love and unity.  In truth, I hope and believe that this would be not only a necessary shift but an extremely positive one.  A shift that, if we choose NOT to move into, will mean more death, dying and really, possibly the real END of the world as we know it.

In my humble opinion, our current path of self interest, self absorption and violent need to be right at other's expense, paired with complete disregard for others opinions or values is a toxic brew which will lead to world destruction.  If you take a look at what is happening just in the environment with money and greed driving business at the Earth's expense, it is easily seen that in just a few years we will tumble over an environmental cliff of no return.  

On this day (and into next year) can we find it in ourselves to step out of our own self into the BIG community of life here on earth and see what a lovely place this would be if we could all just get along...if we could all understand that this beautiful planet belongs to ALL OF US not just companies, individuals with lots of money and power ...if we could understand in our guts that once it is ruined, life will end...could this monumental realization then help us be less concerned about our own interests and more open to becoming part of the world community.  So, tomorrow lets argue a little less, make friends with someone who lives on the other side of the world from you and listen to what concerns them, heck listen to your neighbor without judgement or agenda and then put your OWN interests aside for theirs.  One act of kindness and understanding in this new age can create a mountain of change.  

Happy New Year/Age to all.

December 22, 2012 - Outside my front door, first real snow of winter

Kindness Can Mean Everything

(written about 6 weeks ago.....)
I recently read an article on the Daily Good blog about how "It is more important to be kind than being clever."  The blog's author related a story about how he made a clever comment to his grandmother when he was 10 years old.  He made her cry.  That was when his grandfather made this profound statement.  Read the whole article at http://www.dailygood.org/view.php?sid=306 .

This article made me stop for a moment to ponder what it actually was saying.  Was it saying that in our business ventures we have become more concerned with money and getting ahead then thinking about how our actions affect our fellow man?  Does it say that every action has a consequence in some one's life and the ability to be really good or really bad? Or does it simply make the point that kindness should be the basis of everything we do and that you never know how profoundly you can make a difference with a single act?

I think it says all of those things.  I find it particularly telling when in a country where we are told constantly that things are REALLY bad, that big businesses are not prospering, that people are unemployed and it is becoming harder to get ahead in this world, where our 20 plus year old children with college educations can't find jobs and where mature workers sit idly by in minimum wage service jobs not valued for their knowledge or wisdom..that the prevailing attitude among many people I know is,  "Oh well, too bad, glad I'm not you!"

I often wonder where all the kindness and love went in this country supposedly built upon those very "Christian" principles.  

We are facing in our current elections this fall a stark difference in philosophical beliefs.  One party, despite what they may say in the next 6 weeks of campaigning is solidly a party of Christian's who believes that if you are poor, unemployed, old, physically or mentally challenged, desirous of an education at any age or enjoy the arts that well, it sucks to be you.  I spoke recently with a friend about the upcoming elections, he is a kind person, he is a Christian .  He agreed with me that if the Republican party wins in November that EVERY social support from NPR to Pell Grants, Dept of Education to support of the less fortunate would disappear.  I was excited yet sad that he would agree with me.  

On the other hand, our friends the Democrats have instituted the beginning of a Health Care plan that's major tenet was Health Care for Everyone because its too costly now. I think we can all agree that the pharmaceutical companies and health insurance industries are out of control.  I have no insurance and if I get sick...I cannot go to the doctor without incurring a $100 charge....for an office visit.  THAT is outrageous. A Z pack prescription costs $150 for this popular antibiotic...ridiculous!  Obama has also tried to save the biggest industry in America by giving it a hand when it needed it (kind eh?) and stopped banks from charging our kids double the interest on their Pell Grants. 

My point is that the Republicans seem to be a party of money grubbing, religious zealots without hearts who think that it is ok to prevaricate at every turn to get their way.  Democrats, on the other hand at least appear to want to try to solve some social issues in the only way it's been done in the past which it to make another plan and throw money at it.  At least they seem to be kind.  

So, I did not intend this to be a political treatise as I want this to be a kind blog, one that speaks about my journey and the things I've learned along the way. So...PLEASE forgive me this one digression. 

One thing I've learned is that it HURTS me when I find out that an action I've taken has hurt someone.  If I've been unkind or unloving, either from omission or commission, and it has trickled down, its ripples running out into people's lives ...then I feel badly and wonder how that ripple might have bumped people temporarily off their path or affected them, maybe even caused them to change their direction or intention.  A single word can totally change a person's life, 3 words,  I love you, are the best words to hear ever.

I've been the recipient of a lot of kindnesses.  This computer I am using now plus the 2 before were given to me without cost.  Some one's castoffs for sure but after some repair (thank you Jim,Jake,Roger & Robert!) they work/ed great.  What a wonderful gift! These friends didn't have to think about my needs or do a kind act but they did and those acts had a huge affect on my life!  There are many others who have acted kindly towards me providing a service, money or a summer job because they could.  They knew what a big deal it would be to me.  

What response have these acts elicited from me, have I, in return, demanded more kind acts?  Have I held tightly onto my good fortune and thought, "wow too bad for you that you are over there suffering, Ha ha, I've got stuff and you don't!" No, instead, kind acts breed kind acts and I have in turn tried to watch others carefully for signs of need so that I can extend support, looked at strangers with new eyes knowing how hard it is right now maybe there are things, actions, information that I have that I can give away which will help someone along their path.  I do not speak about this usually, as kindness multiplies, I think, when done in secret without demands.

There are a lot of good Republicans and Democrats out there, kind, generous, normal people who have worked hard to get where they are.  They've had lots of breaks along the way, things have probably pretty much gone swimmingly for them. But there are also out there a lot of good Democrats and Republicans who thought they had the American dream made then 2008 happened and they lost it all.  They did nothing wrong except in some cases be in the wrong place at the wrong time.  It was kind of like a tornado when it hits, one house stands another is blown away.  These fine folks didn't ask or deserve this but yet here they were up to their hips in muck they never dreamed of being in.  So, what ya gonna do about this situation? All our fighting and yelling at each other is neither kind nor conducive to problem solving.  

So, I don't have the answers to our national/international problems.  I do know what Jesus would do....he'd give that homeless person his coat without question and then walk with him that next mile....Would you?

Legacy Wishes

During the last several years while looking for a job, I've been challenged over and over again to think about what I want to do with my life.  I am asked, what work would inspire me to jump out of bed everyday excited to be alive.  A myriad of employment gurus encourage me to think about what my goals are for the next 2, 5, 10, 20 years...Heck, I'll be happy if I'm not in a rocker by then.  My goals right now are to get up everyday and do something positive.  I've categorically been unable to speak to what my driving passion is, what my life goals are, what do I want to do.  Refusing to box myself in with only one thing to do or be passionate about, I've kept my options open.  Life is exciting, there are many things which spark my curiosity, engage my mind and creativity which I would love to have the time to pursue. 

However, when a person recently asked me what legacy I would want to leave behind when I left this physical world...I paused.   This question caught my attention for whenever I think of my legacy my mind flies away into the upper stratosphere.  That is the place where perfection, pure thought and purpose hang out.  Of course, I want to leave a legacy, don't we all?  So, I started thinking.

I want to leave a legacy of love, good will, kindness, giving and gratitude.  As I float down from the cloud of hyperbole to more solid ground, my mind and gut say that when I "shake off this earthly mantle", I would like my friends and family at least to think kindly of me and smile, then laugh while reminiscing about things we've done together. My kids don't ask for much and they don't have much but the personalities they were born with and maybe my curiosity.  So, any legacy I leave, I'd like to have include money.  Hopefully, enough to give some to my kids, friends and to organizations I like which are doing good.  Enough to send the grand kids on journeys to find themselves and their passion in life and give them experiences that will help them become people of honor and empathy.  Maybe these journeys would be to college, maybe to Bangladesh...who knows.  Some too for fighting poverty, hunger and hatred.


 Mostly, I think I want to leave my grand kids, kids and friends the sure knowledge that their dreams are what drive them and if those dreams get subverted or ignored by the humdrum of everyday living, then they will never really be happy nor will they reach their true potential.  

  And with this in mind my brain floats up again to the stratosphere and thinks of all the millions of people experiencing want right now...I think of all that potential going to waste... I think how easy it would be to encourage and inspire them to greatness with a little kindness and hope and I wish heartily upon that first star on the right straight out past midnight that the universe will shower upon me a boatload of cash.  Why? Because I would leave a legacy of good in my path...as I slide into the darkness with a Margarita in one hand, Handel's ice cream cone in the other yelling...WHOOOO HOOOO look out eternity!!!.

Friends, Especially When They Show Up Unexpectedly, Rock

Photo Credit: Amy Forniash
Vera in Tom Hennessy
Original "hat"


   I've been trying to write an article about friends all week long and I just can't seem to get it done.  Everything I write arrives onto the page and either sounds maudlin or stilted.  The fact is, when I talk about my friends and what they mean to me I get all choked up.  I'm just totally the biggest fan of all my friends. 

I wasn't always this way.  In fact, its taken a long time to get me to a place where I even thought I had friends.  I knew a lot of people but didnt' really think that they thought too much of me.  Now, I'm giddy because over the last couple of years, the universe has wacked me over the head repeatedly proving to me over and over again that I had people who cared about me.  This was amazing to me but I also realized friendship comes with responsibility. 

Having friends means that I have to work harder to be the best me I can be.  I owe it to them.  They like ME and when I veer from my true path or personality, they let me know.  So I've learned to be true to myself and listen to the advice I give to others.  It most often applies to me too.

I tend to be kinder to people because when I hurt my friends feelings, they get quiet and lower their eyes and sometimes don't call me for a while.  When I hurt others, I hurt, so I try to make sure that while trying to be myself, I don't run over them with my opinions or demands. 

Friendship has made me a better person.  I'm far from perfect for sure but I do try to consider how my actions will affect those I love.  In the long run, this attitude spreads to others and I find that in my daily interactions I now see strangers as potential friends and treat them with kindness,   respect and consideration.  Being kind takes practice.

My friends are my biggest cheerleaders and from them I've learned to say things like Great Job or Oh, I'm sorry or WOW that is terrific! or Are you SURE you want to do that? 

 Being a friend means that you've got each other's back, that you become enthusiastic when friends attempt scary things that are good for them but drop guarded warnings whenthey're about to do something silly. Do I make mistakes, sure do and so I've learned to say, I'm sorry, too.

   

My friends live all over the United States, so, it isn't often that we are in the same place at the same time.  But when we are, there is a great amount of hugging, laughing, crying, big fish tale-like hiking story-telling and fun.  At the end, we sigh and wave good-bye and promise to get together more often or say, YES, we will hike with them in this or that month.  But truly, we all are aware of the fragility of life and my crowd of friends is aging. 

We've learned to value those special times of sharing.  We box them up, wrap them in bright paper and bold ribbons, store them on a prominent shelf in our minds so that we can get them out often to page through them.  We remember that friend's hearty laugh and how it just makes the room light up and all of us smile. We remember the confidences and the promises of support we've made.  As we wave good-bye, already we are planning the next get-together and counting the days until we see one another again.

At this most recent gathering, I had the  opportunity to meet several people who I think will become good friends.  Already, one who is traveling across country, has stopped to visit on his way west.  Another, just got a job after 3 months of unemployment.  Others are planning long hikes. 

Oh and I my lovely children have become good, good friends and  are in the midst of their own exciting changes like graduating from college, starting new enterprises and raising well, my lovely grandchildren.  I am, giddily, proud! 

  

So, when new people come into your life welcome them openly.  Let them blow into your life like a breeze through an open window, let them catch the dust laying in the corners of your life, move the curtains to and fro and stir things up.  When everything settles down again if you're like me you'll feel renewed, and want to climb mountains or stay up all night sharing thoughts.  Or maybe you'll just sit for a while and consider how great it is to be exactly who you are.