With a Bow to the Grateful Dead - It Really Has Been a Long, Strange Trip

It all started with a thought: "I want to spend some time in Florida in January".  It seemed innocent enough. Who wouldn't want to leave the frigid north land of Indiana/Ohio THIS January?  I sure did.

I'd made the decision, after being laid off from ANOTHER job, to just not work for anyone anymore. Realizing that, after all, I was the only one who really cared whether or not I ate...I decided to finally start my own small business.  Yup, just like that.  I'd had enough of sending out resume after resume. I was fed up with the waiting and the silence.  I'd had enough of shutting down businesses and working at jobs that were uninspiring and low paying.  I can hear you guys...I know you KNOW how I feel.  Having spent some years doing work that WAS inspiring, it was hard to accept that the world expected me to settle and sweep floors at a big box store where I do not even want to shop.

So, I gathered some ideas and headed south for a visit, little knowing that I was not going to be back home for two months.. During that time, I'd have some great experiences and meet a bunch of new people. I would visit with long-time friends and share a hot springs tub with new.  I'd see some beautiful sunsets , take some great pictures and cry a bit.  But then how can we know where we will end up when we first start down the trail.  The journey is just that, a journey with surprises around each bend.

Florida was cold yet sunny, windy and sometimes rainy.  I found the contrasts and levels of gray upon gray reflected in the sky, the beach, the birds to be mesmerizing.  There were a lot of birds...Cormorants, Red Headed Mergansers, Plovers, Sandpipers, Gulls, a life bird which I got no pictures of and now can't remember....but at that same place I saw a Common Loon which was cool.  The above bird is a Black-bellied Plover and it too, is a life bird!

During this time, I had an amazing experience with 2 dolphins  Both are regular visitors to the seawall by my friend's house and visit her often.  One late afternoon, I saw the fins breach about 20 feet off the wall...they were fishing.  They have developed a behavior where they will cruise out from the wall driving the fish ahead of them and then surge in to the seawall...or at least that is what I've told myself they do.

I believe they are probably some of the most sentient beings on the planet.  So, when I went out I just wanted to get a few photos of them out in the channel.  As I stood on the seawall, the larger of the two, approached and did a swim by.  "He" circled and came back for another pass, moved out into the channel, came back for another pass followed by the second dolphin, smaller and what I call the "female" but who knows.  After several more passes, he swam by the wall one more time turned, dove then came up blowing out his good-bye with his expulsion of air.  What a wonderful experience and as they swam away I raised my hand in good-bye as they swam towards the bigger water of Tampa Bay.

So, that was just the beginning of the trip which took me to Atlanta to weather the second, Icemageddon, to Northeast Georgia for the first couple of weeks of Thru-hiker season, to Amicolola Falls State Park for the AT Kick-off and then finally, ended with a trip over the mountains in a freakish snow storm, to Hot Springs where I spent several days visiting with good friends and enjoyed the hot springs for the first time.

And now, I am back in Northeast Ohio awaiting spring and the birth of grandchild number five. awaiting the entrance of a new life into this crazy, roller coaster ride we call life.  Bring it on...I can't wait!

The Faster I Go the Behind-er I Get!

Winter Weather - mid-September at Logan Pass

Time seems to pass much more quickly than I seem to be able to keep up with it.  Only a few days ago wasn't I in Montana?  In reality its been nearly 2 months since I came home  The weather there continues to be brutal …with snow and cold temps making the mountains more stunningly beautiful than seems possible. 

New Home on the Indiana Plains

October was a lovely month off and provided me with the opportunity to travel back and forth from Indiana and Ohio, transitioning from my past life in Ohio, to the new back in my home state of Indiana.  I had an opportunity to go to the Gathering in PA, do some hiking in OH and take a trip to Atlanta with a stop for 2 days in Great Smokey Mountain NP to hike.  Luckily, we stayed with some good friends, making this trip an outstanding time.

View of Gatlinburg

I was lucky enough to travel to GA with a 2013 AT Thru hiker so stopping to hike was a given.  After, spending a few days visiting with another hiking friend in Athens, we headed to Gatlinburg, TN to stay with good friends.

Juney Whank Falls

Trying to decide where to hike in GSMNP was challenging., there are just too many great choices. We, finally, decided to stop at Deep Creek and bag 3 waterfalls located very close together.  The weather started off marginally gloomy but turned sunny.  The late fall sun fell on us making the running creek sparkly with watery diamonds.  The leaves were scarlet, ochre, green, brown, gold…a panoply of colors, shades & hues highlighted by the sun made for awe inspiring scenery.

View from Overlook on Newfound Gap Road

On the way to our overnight accommodations, we stopped at several overlooks,bypassing the over crowded  Newfound Gap.   By this time, we were very tired.  Clouds piled up in the valleys, filling them with fog and muting the autumn colors.  The clouds hung with the possibility of snow and the west wind spoke to me of winter as it hit me in the face.  Looking out over the ridges to the southwest there was no sunset to be seen but the eerie light made for a spectacular view.

Baskin Creek Falls Trail

The following day we decided to hike a little traveled trail to another falls.  This trail rolled over 4 sun-filled miles. Traveling through the woods, I saw only 2 people on trail as I walked to the falls and back. The delightful golden orb shone above warming the leaves underneath my feet.  The subtle smell of fall leaves crunching underfoot drifted up reminding me of days long past.  It was hard to refuse the urge to gather large piles of them and bury myself in their earthiness.  This was such a special time of contemplation and peace, I’ve not had for many years.

Baskin Creek Falls

The falls were splendid and I paused there with 4 others to have a snack, feeling the good feeling that conquering a challenging climb down can bring.  I rock-hopped across the creek to sit on a large granite boulder engaging 2 guys in the only on trail conversation of the day.

Bear Scat - Source of Possible Noises

Despite being alone in the woods, I was far from alone.  Down the in the valley, bushes rustled and the noises followed me up the trail.  I smelled various smells as I walked, I wondered if I’d finally see a bear on trail having not seen a bear all summer while in Montana.. But I did not, I only saw a squirrel and exchanged a few whistled tunes with some Chickadees.

Me -  Enjoying a Beautiful Fall DA

What a wonderful time was given like a gift to me, it seemed from the universe.  This transition time between the moves was a great way to create some space between 2 vastly different worlds.   Montana  was like summer camp, a time of dreams come true.   Indiana is, however, like a time for being responsible.  It is home and I am happy to be with family.  The universe has so graciously provided me with all that I’ve asked for.  A place to live between both my girls, a job which pays enough for me to pay bills & be generous (tis wondrous).  It has been a bounteous time for which I am grateful.  So many things to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.

Indian Creek Falls

The Beautiful Summer

I walked the other day on a lovely trail...not too steep but just a little, not too down but just a little...it was just right.  It led me along the river that runs by the Inn.  Its babblings spoke of summer sun and pine scent and peace.  The river carried this news further down and further down into the town where hopefully it spoke its peace, dissipating it into the general population.

It is high summer here in the Montana mountains and with summer comes a plethora of beauty.  So much beauty, often, I find it overwhelming my senses to the point that I cannot blog, write, photograph it...the creation is unable to be documented with sufficient human acts to do it justice..so I do not; I just look and remember. But on this particular day, I found that beauty had turned to bounty.  Lining the trail was the beginning of the summer abundance...you got it....berries!!!

 

 If you have never tasted an alpine strawberry, well then you have never tasted a real strawberry.  They are tiny about the size of the end of my little finger.  They are hard to find, about 1 in every 5 plants has this tiny treat hanging under its leaves.  However, it is packed with the flavor of 10 of those strawberry taffy bars, only better!  Hungrily, I ravaged the tiny plants up the 1.25 mile trail.  The rewards were few but each time I found one I wanted to cry, "Eureka" for the discover meant just the briefest of moments of  exquisite flavor. 

Oh, I guess I also forgot to mention that the first of the Huckleberries were also ripening.  Small, blueberry like berries but different, they tasted more like a blueberry with a pinch of sourness which blended in my mouth to create a need for more.  So, as my hiking partner and I edged our way up the mountain we feasted upon nature's bounty and I tried to remember that the animals who we share this beautiful mountain with also needed this bounty for their survival.

 And there is the rub for me, trying to remember that it is NOT all abut Moi.  In fact, in this place, it most definitely is very little about me.  This is not my home, although it is.  The food that grows in great abundance here is balanced each year so that the true residents of this mountainside can survive.  If I decide that alllll this is really mine and I can take it all, who actually loses?  Not me, for I can go to the grocery and buy really all I will ever need ten times over, only thing I'll lose is the fleeting sensation of pleasure I receive from tasting the berries of the mountains.  This taste reminds me that at some point in time "I" knew about how to take care of myself in the wilderness.  Somewhere back in time, in my wild brain, I knew that this abundance helped "me" through the winter too and I vied with the wildlife for it.  But now, I don't need it so what is my right to it?  

It was with these thoughts rolling about in my head that I hiked up and up not to far, not too long but just enough to view the river flowing happily below, to smell the pine scent, to think about my wild self and to feel the breeze on my face.  All of these sensations helped me to get back to the ancient me, that still small voice on the inside that said, "Eat the berries, but not too much, leave some for those who will come behind you whether it be bear or human.  You do not need it all for nature is abundant and takes care of her own. There will be more for you when you need it, as you need it."  And so, as I reached down to find another tiny, red treasure, I thanked her for her provision and bounty, knowing that she will take care of those who love her.   

Appalachian Trail Thru Hiker Dreamin'

Me, AT Dreamin'

So, for a long time I've had a number of dreams...I would love to experience world peace, have a lot of money, free time to do good and love. But I have to say that the thing that makes me stare out the window, read magazines and sigh is the dream of travel, either by foot, car, camel, elephant or boat.  I'd like to see far off lands, ancient lands, pyramids and alligators.  I'd like to jump out of my car and follow that creek bed into the woods to see where it goes.  I'd like to hike the AT, JMT, PCT and parts of the FT.  I'd like to sleep in Wal Mart parking lots in my car on the way to cool places...the spirit of a gypsy lives inside this mild-mannered almost 60 year old.

Carla R & Judy: Solo Hikers

A friend has kindly engaged me in a project that she is starting.  She had developed a course to teach women how to thru hike the AT by themselves.  Some of the biggest roadblocks for women who desire to hike are all centered around security and safety.  My friend, Carla Robertson, hiked the AT in 2009 all by her lonesome.  Solo, one, not relying on a man and survived.  In fact, based on what a strong, sensitive and intuitive woman she is, she flourished on her solo thru hike.  Instead of allowing fear to minimize her and make her shrink into herself; she found, from what I can surmise, peace, purpose and a strong sense of self.  What a great outcome, right?!!!

So, she has kindly asked me to help out with gear knowledge and old fart women hiker stuff.  Little does she know that I am going to be a sponge.  I'm going to soak up everything that I can because...I STILL want to hike by myself.  What youngsters who are staring the world in the face don't realize is that as you acquire knowledge, understanding and grace while aging, you also discover that the world is scary!  Things happen! What if I fall and I can't get up.  I need some courage.  So, I'm going to listen, take notes and take no prisoners.  Someday soon, maybe next year who knows...it'll be my time. 

Photo Credit: Barb Drabic

So, Ms Robertson...thank you very much.  And for those of you considering, dreaming nay its just a tickle in the back of your brain crazy idea to do things on  your own, to hike, to fly, to travel...well here is the ground breaking course for you to consider taking.  

Wild and White Blazing

ADDENDUM:  Carla points out in the comments below and I concur that this course is for ANY woman who desires to hike.  Although, the course is designed to help you plan an AT hike, things you learn I THINK will be transferable to other trails.  However you want to hike, whether it be solo, with a partner or a group, Carla's class will be an invaluable resource as you prepare. 

An Ounce Is An Ounce

Photo Credit: Restless Jim Davis

 Every year during thru hiker season, I enjoy participating in the pack Tuckerizing .ceremony.  It is a time to see new gear, to talk trail, to look at wanna be thru hikers gear selections and sometimes it is a time when I press the palm of my hand into my forehead and shake my head.  I've seen some pretty crazy stuff in packs like 2 rectangular bags full of various cosmetics, face cleaning items, anti-itch, anti-sweat, anti-bug and anti-wrinkle creams, plus band aids LOTS of different sized band aids.  Now, for the most part just let me say that band aids don't really work for hikers, usually its because they are sweaty and hot.  Band aids don't stick well to sweaty, wet skin...generally it takes duct tape. 

So, I know a lot of hikers, I even can play one on TV if I wanted to.  I used to sell a lot of gear at a major gear store.  Most of you know this about me.  What you do not know, maybe, is that I am a secret pack evaluator.  Meaning that I cannot pass by someone wearing a backpack without doing one of those superhuman scans where everything is revealed.  If you have too much stuff in your pack and you want to keep it...I am your worst enemy.  If you want to lighten up, I can be your best friend.  

Potential Ruck Tucker-izers

If you've ever been to an ALDHA event (goggle it) then you may have heard about a secret ceremony that occurs once, maybe twice a year at the PA Ruck and Trail Days.  It is called Pack Tuckerizing.  You will have to wait for another time to hear the whole story of how this event started and I have to admit I was not there at the very first Tuckerizing.  I think Friar Tuck and Jim Owen might be the only ones who know when the practice first started.  But it was a historic event which has helped many hikers in the ensuing years lower their pack weight 
and hike more comfortably.

When a friend, who is hiking this year, said recently to me, "My knee is killing me, I have no idea why and I'm not going to hike much just a couple of days."  I was duly upset for him. Then he said the magic words, " I REALLLLY need to lower my pack weight."  BINGO, Nelly...that's what I've been trying to tell you, I thought.  Instead, I said, "really?!"

When he invited me to look at his pack earlier this year before hitting the trail and I'd suggested that he leave some things home, he said things like, "oh, that doesn't weigh very much" and "Oh I have to have my giant knife and also my multi-tool."  Statements like these always make me say my stock answer which is "Well, an ounce is an ounce and you put 16 together you have a pound." and his reply was to put everything BACK into his pack. 

Photo Credit: DeLee Smith

This seems obvious but I know that when I started backpacking, I said the same thing.  So, I put in extra socks because I worried about wet feet, I put in extra food because I worried about starving, I put in extra clothes because I worried about being cold, I carried soap because of dirt, I carried...well you get the idea.  I carried things because of fear.  Not knowing what to expect I thought if I was prepared that I could use those things as a shield to keep me from all the unexpected things "out" there in the great unknown. I hoped that if I put all the things I carried on like a coat it would protect me from having to feel the fear and deal with it, to be cold, wet, out of food, dirty...but what I found was that it wasn't the things that kept my fear at bay it was the walking.   

 Was it easy to par down my pack size? No, each time I left something at home, decided to go with a higher degree bag and leave the extra pillows home, it was uncomfortable but I didn't die..yet.  Lately, due to knee issues, lack of time and aging I have had to face that fear even more because there can be no more backpacking unless there is less weight in my pack.  The real fear, I think, each of us face everyday is that there might not be time to do the things that are really important to us.  Guess its time to take stock and maybe I'll have to leave that teddy bear at home.....  

What's Goin' On?

A friend asked me the other day if I had abandoned my blog....I told her, no, I had not but I do admit that I am busy.  It's late spring here in NE Ohio and it is just a busy time.  The trees are out, the soil is dry, the weeds are growing.  There are gardens to plant and acres to mow, trails to walk and pictures to take.  Birds are migrating in and out and this year, the first in a several years, I've actually been able to take the time to participate in one of my favorite hobbies, birdwatching.  Last week, I snagged a sighting of a Baltimore Oriole, one of the first sightings in my area. 

In my effort to gain marketable skills, I've also taken on some extra writing projects and am managing the Portage Park District's Facebook page.  That takes time.  Hopefully, in a couple of weeks I'll lead some hikes, right now I'm busy. 

Then there are the trips...one very soon sends me to Indiana to my daughter's college graduation ceremony then another right after to an annual get together in Virginia for AT hikers.  This is an event where I see long time friends, friends I see only at this event...there is a lot of talking and rocking on the front porch of the Hiker's Inn, laughing, wine drinking and walking...that's Trail Days.  I can't wait.  I am busy.

No one really ever thinks of time until there isn't enough of it or if you face an event that reminds you that there REALLY never is enough.  Recently, I bought something that has a 20 year warranty ....standing there I did the math and realized that wow...20 years...I'll be an age that I never even thought I would get to when I was young and now, gosh it is only 20 years away.  An age where my health may not be so good, where I will no longer be a great gardener or able to walk very far in pursuit of that great bird, when no longer will I enjoy riding the lawn tractor over the bumps in my yard nor ride my bike on the Tow Path.  These thoughts make me vow that starting now, I'll enjoy each moment and do the things I need to do to stay able to do those things I love for a very, long time.

Blog Restrictions

Its taken me a bit of time to figure out a solution to the whole issue Blogger seems to have with customizing one's blog.  I have an idea in my head but my non-understanding of HTML is keeping me from realizing my dream.  So, then, how to get around it.  I think I've figured it out.

I am going to post gear reviews/how to use gear posts in this regular section of the blog, allowing me visibility and ease of entry.  Then behind on the "technical pages", I'll insert websites, blogs, pictures, etc as a "go here for more information" section. 

Look for the long-awaited stove discussion coming later this week.  It appears to be a 2 part-er.  I expect to stir up some good discussions and get some good information exchange going on.  Please feel free to post a comment and/or pass it on if you think the info is valuable.  For those who are non technical and not a gearhead like me...well you'll just have to hold on for a bit ....

Enjoy the spring weather.  Birds are singing, the raccoons that evidently live in my chimney are tap dancing on my roof and it looks like a big storm is brewing outside the coffee shop window.  AHH, its March...our friend the west wind is blowing everything about and soon all the hikers will be be blowing up the Appalachian Trail in an effort to beat him to Mount Katahdin.  These gear blogs are dedicated to my friends who are soon to be starting another grand adventure.

Friends, Especially When They Show Up Unexpectedly, Rock

Photo Credit: Amy Forniash
Vera in Tom Hennessy
Original "hat"


   I've been trying to write an article about friends all week long and I just can't seem to get it done.  Everything I write arrives onto the page and either sounds maudlin or stilted.  The fact is, when I talk about my friends and what they mean to me I get all choked up.  I'm just totally the biggest fan of all my friends. 

I wasn't always this way.  In fact, its taken a long time to get me to a place where I even thought I had friends.  I knew a lot of people but didnt' really think that they thought too much of me.  Now, I'm giddy because over the last couple of years, the universe has wacked me over the head repeatedly proving to me over and over again that I had people who cared about me.  This was amazing to me but I also realized friendship comes with responsibility. 

Having friends means that I have to work harder to be the best me I can be.  I owe it to them.  They like ME and when I veer from my true path or personality, they let me know.  So I've learned to be true to myself and listen to the advice I give to others.  It most often applies to me too.

I tend to be kinder to people because when I hurt my friends feelings, they get quiet and lower their eyes and sometimes don't call me for a while.  When I hurt others, I hurt, so I try to make sure that while trying to be myself, I don't run over them with my opinions or demands. 

Friendship has made me a better person.  I'm far from perfect for sure but I do try to consider how my actions will affect those I love.  In the long run, this attitude spreads to others and I find that in my daily interactions I now see strangers as potential friends and treat them with kindness,   respect and consideration.  Being kind takes practice.

My friends are my biggest cheerleaders and from them I've learned to say things like Great Job or Oh, I'm sorry or WOW that is terrific! or Are you SURE you want to do that? 

 Being a friend means that you've got each other's back, that you become enthusiastic when friends attempt scary things that are good for them but drop guarded warnings whenthey're about to do something silly. Do I make mistakes, sure do and so I've learned to say, I'm sorry, too.

   

My friends live all over the United States, so, it isn't often that we are in the same place at the same time.  But when we are, there is a great amount of hugging, laughing, crying, big fish tale-like hiking story-telling and fun.  At the end, we sigh and wave good-bye and promise to get together more often or say, YES, we will hike with them in this or that month.  But truly, we all are aware of the fragility of life and my crowd of friends is aging. 

We've learned to value those special times of sharing.  We box them up, wrap them in bright paper and bold ribbons, store them on a prominent shelf in our minds so that we can get them out often to page through them.  We remember that friend's hearty laugh and how it just makes the room light up and all of us smile. We remember the confidences and the promises of support we've made.  As we wave good-bye, already we are planning the next get-together and counting the days until we see one another again.

At this most recent gathering, I had the  opportunity to meet several people who I think will become good friends.  Already, one who is traveling across country, has stopped to visit on his way west.  Another, just got a job after 3 months of unemployment.  Others are planning long hikes. 

Oh and I my lovely children have become good, good friends and  are in the midst of their own exciting changes like graduating from college, starting new enterprises and raising well, my lovely grandchildren.  I am, giddily, proud! 

  

So, when new people come into your life welcome them openly.  Let them blow into your life like a breeze through an open window, let them catch the dust laying in the corners of your life, move the curtains to and fro and stir things up.  When everything settles down again if you're like me you'll feel renewed, and want to climb mountains or stay up all night sharing thoughts.  Or maybe you'll just sit for a while and consider how great it is to be exactly who you are.    

Wow, Walking #2!

WOW! I just walked 2 miles, I thought happily as I arrived back in the parking lot at my car.  I patted myself on the back feeling full of joy and accomplishment.  Despite the waning, evening sun's attempt to warm me and the effort I had expended on that last climb, I was chilled.  As I stood in the 40 mph wind at the car knocking the mud off my shoes, my thoughts wandered into the past to 2005. 

A clear vision of myself standing atop Silar's Bald in North Carolina came to me in a flash.  At that moment on Silar's Bald, I was full to the top with mixed emotions,  laughing and crying for the revelations I'd had there  It was at the end of this 100 plus mile hike that I'd realized that up there, on that mountain with my world on my back, I was more, ME, than I'd ever been before.  This realization changed my life and since then I've never been the same. 

Really, I'm sure you've noticed me staring off out the window with a come hither look in my eye or possibly disappearing into my thoughts in the middle of a conversation.  Yes, I've left you and this place and even this body I am now hauling around and gone back to that moment, that day.

So, it was with surprise that on this chilly Thursday in February standing in the cold wind at my car door after walking a small distance in comparison, that I found myself feeling, well, full of myself at my accomplishment. 

The last several years of underemployment, office jobs and lack of paid time off has left its toll causing me to not only inevitably age but also lose muscles and gain weight.  Throw in the knee issues which sideline me at whim and well, I've not stayed in shape.  Let's face it, I'm about as out of shape as I've ever been.  However,this year I've made a vow.  Irrevocable and demanding its due, I will have to pay it at the end of this year.

Most would think maybe I've made excuses and I'll take that because when faced with difficulties, I think a portion of that is ok.  When a bunch of adversaries come at you, all at one time, in a fierce group, nashing their terrible teeth, trying to bring you down, well, a person can only fight them one at a time, the rest of those nasties you just have to push to the side the best you can. 



Photo by Restless Jim Davis

So, this year the vow includes walking 2 miles, then hiking 8 and then backpacking again if the knee allows.  Only the knee will create the inability, I've decided, not the psyche, not the excuses, not the time, not the lack of funds.  I will lay all my chips down and let them fall as they may to win it all.  I want to get that edge back, that feeling that I have the moon and stars in my hands.  I want the confidence to know that I can climb to the top of the mountain again with the wind at my back and the mountains in front of me knowing that I can go, do and be whomever I want to be. I want to feel that exhiliration again before I sink too far into the barcalounger and end up staying there.

As the sun sets over Tallmadge Meadows Park, I thought, I'll take the 2 miles today and raise them to 4 next week and then 6 in a month.  I'll get there and if I don't, it won't be because I didn't try.  If the knee fails me then I'll find a way to recreate that top of the mountain feeling again by finding new risks to take, like publishing my poetry or FINALLY sending in a submission to a magazine.  Yup, THOSE things REALLY scare me.